Understanding Anxiety: The Role of Empathy
Suck it up Buttercup…..Have you heard that phrase? It means when you have problems that you should pull up your bootstraps, try harder and get over it. Even though, I’ve probably used that phrase myself, it means something different when used on you.
Today, I overheard a conversation that really put things into perspective for me. A young woman, whom I will call Eva, was sharing her struggles with anxiety and fear. The person she spoke to, another woman, Debbie, was a bit older. Eva was pouring her heart out, nearly in tears as she explained to Debbie that her anxiety over the simplest matters had reached a level that interfered with her ability to think clearly and make decisions. She wakes up each day with overwhelming thoughts of dread and fear, which affect her ability to find peace and experience joy.
Eva is a believer who understands that true joy comes from the Lord. She knows the Bible is true and dedicates time to studying God’s word and praying. Debbie suggested that if Eva engages in these activities, she should feel better. Therefore, Debbie implied that there must be sin in Eva’s life; if her heart were truly clean, she wouldn’t experience these struggles.
Now, Eva will not only struggle with anxiety but with guilt.
It’s worth noting that Debbie has never faced challenges like depression or anxiety. She also hasn’t endured the traumatic childhood that Eva experienced.
When we encounter someone struggling with an issue, we must be sensitive. If we haven’t experienced the issue ourselves we may have a difficult time understanding it’s impact. It’s easy to advise someone to try harder or draw closer to the Lord; while that should be the first step, it doesn’t instantly eliminate all emotional challenges.
This is where empathy plays a crucial role.
Romans 12:15 reminds us, “Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep.” The Bible acknowledges that our struggles on earth are valid and complex.
If I could talk to Eva, I would listen and allow her to express her concerns. I would validate her feelings because they are real. I would empathize with her frustration and encourage her to maintain a close and pure relationship with the Lord. Additionally, I would suggest practical strategies to combat her toxic thoughts and overwhelming anxiety, such as listening to music, practicing deep breathing exercises, engaging in physical activity, redirecting her thoughts, and considering therapy.
Just because we haven’t faced the same challenges as others doesn’t mean their struggles are trivial or easy to overcome. If we find it difficult to understand a problem, someone else might have a different perspective. Let’s offer the same grace and understanding to others that God shows us.
